The Birds Aren’t Real!

I heard a lot of buzzing in the air today — more than usual. The birds (mostly Canadian geese near me) looked the same as usual, but something was off. I can’t put my finger on it, but it’s something. I noticed another odd thing today: The bird feeder in my front yard is empty again. Maybe the CIA has new bird drones that can “consume” food to deceive the public, yes? I mean, birds used to eat before the Great Avian Replacement (GAR). It’s likely that the CIA developed versions of mechanical birds that can appear to eat, lest bird feeders would always be full, and pet stores would never be able to sell bird food. That would definitely raise uncomfortable questions. They’re trying to confuse us, but it won’t work. Birds aren’t real!